In the latest Things I Learned With Movie X, I consider the historical lessons to be taken away from Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter, a film in which Abraham Lincoln chases down and kills the undead. Even though I sort of liked the film overall, there were some parts of it that drove me a little crazy when I was thinking about them afterwards, and if nothing else, these columns act as handy ways for me to work through my conflicting feelings about crappy films.